The First Football team to be managed by a computer (infographic)

A story of football, Artificial Intelligence and (rumoured) robot wives.

©2013 James Mathurin

Most expensive computer repair infographic

A bit late in the day posting this. I will blame computer problems.

©2013 James Mathurin

The most over-priced computer repair

The most over-priced computer repair was carried out on the 11^th November 2004, when Barry Quigley, a computer repairman from Wellington, New Zealand, charged $437.68 for removing a piece of Ham and Pineapple pizza from the CD-drive of Marty Halland’s PC.

“I feel sorry for him,” said Quigley at the time, ”but hopefully this will make him remember which appliance does what job. A month ago he asked me to defragment his dishwasher, and I had to charge him $25 for the call-out charge.”

Quigley took several photographs of the opened computer, explaining later that,

"I mean, come on! After pizza in the CD tray, I had no idea what else he had done to it, and I wasn't about to leave, I don't know, a goldfish on the motherboard, and have him say I put it there or something later.'"

Photograph by _rockinfree.

 ©2013 James Mathurin 

The first football club to be managed by a computer

The first football club to be managed by a computer was Worksop Town, whose chairman, Terrence Mawinney, insisted on installing the Artificintellimac 5.1 as manager after the club fired Peter Jacksmith from the position in the 1988/89 season. The computer, built my Mawinney’s company, Winneyworks, guided Worksop to third place in the Shamois Leather East Division, their highest position for 7 years, until it was corrupted by a virus, and substituted the left-winger for a cashier from the club shop, and sold the stadium’s goal-posts to hire a new physio. The Artificintellimac was removed as manager with five games of the season left, after being given the chairman’s “complete support.”

Terrence Mawinney is pictured here conducting a tour around Winneyworks' factory for potential investors. Many fans have suggested that Mawinney only installed the Artificintellimac as manager as a publicity stunt, but Mawinney's daughter suggested, in an interview with Techslice magazine, that Mawinney had, over his lifetime, developed an obsession with Artificial Intelligence, and sought out any opportunity to place computers into traditionally human roles. She also intimated that a "restricted area of the factory was devoted to an ultimately failed attempt to construct an "artificial wife" for Mawinney, according to his stipulations, one of which was an appreciation of football. Photograph by NRCgov.

 ©2013 James Mathurin